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The Human Factor

By David Smith
President, The Employers’ Association
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People seem to forget that they were born with one mouth and two ears. Might we not learn valuable lessons if only we listened twice as much as we talked? What might happen if only people began to listen before speaking — or if our elected officials listened at all? (Think about that last thought…elections are coming soon!)

Too few people seek a solution by asking “why,” preferring to state what they feel is obvious rather than discovering what might be happening behind the scenes. If people were to dig a bit deeper before reacting to obvious symptoms they might be able to resolve issues more effectively (and in a more lasting manner) by addressing their root cause (asking questions, seeking answers then acting boldly). It has been stated that we retain only a small fraction of what we hear…think how much less we will retain if we are so busy talking that we cannot hear what is being said by others!

It takes courage to listen. In order to listen one often must be the first to ask questions — admitting (either directly or implicitly) that he or she does not know all the answers. To be an effective listener we must recognize that gathering information in order to make a decision is a sign of strength rather than an admission of weakness. When one first seeks direction before moving forward, only two failures can result — either acting before all the facts have been gathered and discussed or analyzing facts to the point that a decision is never made. Questioning should clarify, expand and refine a solution prior to its implementation rather than simply validating one’s thoughts before taking a predetermined action. When questioning, remain receptive to what you might hear. Far too many of us admit our small weaknesses and apprehensions in order to hide our greater flaws and insecurities from others.

Good listening involves the asking of open-ended questions (as opposed to giving close-ended solutions), the encouragement of others to expand on partially developed thoughts (rather than adding to it yourself), and engaging introspective individuals so that they might contribute to the process. When listening for effective solutions, the only “bad or dumb question” is one not asked. It is up to you to solicit discussion, being careful not to either openly discourage input nor failing to create an atmosphere that encourages conversation. When asking questions make sure those offering answers know you listen to their thoughts before moving forward with a solution — you will hear what they say and process it before acting — or you will stifle an otherwise productive interchange.

Actions speak louder than words. I have heard people say things like “I care… I’m interested… I’m listening…” as they continue writing or working on another project when someone tries to speak to them. One might ask all the right questions but discourage an engaged response by projecting a vacant look in their eyes that screams, “I don’t hear you, nor do I care!” (One can “speak” so loudly with body language that nothing else can be heard!) Paying attention to the “tone” of body language will often allow us to “hear” with our eyes as well as our ears.

Keep your mind receptive to the thoughts behind questions someone asks. Listening involves more than hearing words — it requires the processing of information prior to the generation (and delivery) of solutions. There is always more left “unsaid” than is “said” during any conversation — we must concentrate to hear beyond the content of spoken words if we want to understand their context and intent. Hearing the subtleties behind the words being spoken helps us to discern any underlying thoughts or concerns withheld by the speaker — thoughts that might derail an otherwise sound course of action.

Listening is a complex task. Some people listen far too much, acting far too infrequently (back to the elected official reference?). Others act too quickly without taking the time to hear alternative possibilities. A patient listener can be a great addition to any work team, but too many listeners can impede progress. In order to work with and through people we must act on what they say as well as on what may be implied but not said — but we must act, linking our listening skills to intentional actions in order to accomplish specific tasks.

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• column
• david smith
• human resources
• the employers’ association
• the human factor